Editor's Note - This is an excerpt from the September 2003 issue of the Buddhist Wheel

Many times, we find ourselves faced with a seemingly unresolvable dilemma. I’d like to share with you briefly an article from the Advertiser’s “Expressions of Faith”, written by Rev. Bruce Nakamura.

Rev. Bruce relates the story of “a father who was really ill, and it meant even more so for the daughter to convert him… to save his soul.” What a dilemma it was for the father who never questioned the religion that he shared with his parents. After the daughter left, his wife always expressed disapproval, but because he felt peace in the family was important, he relented and agreed to convert to his daughter’s religion. After he got better and left the hospital, his daughter insisted that his new God saved him, so he must follow through with the promise he made to her.

Rev. Bruce said that this happened to a real family and has happened to many families. When we are ill, we are often the weakest in moments of adversity, so we follow the demanding wishes of our children for the sake of family peace, as was the case of this father and daughter. For the daughter, her father’s conversion was important to her spirituality; her way was the only right way. She did not realize her father was already embraced within the light of the purity of Amida’s wisdom-compassion; she did not know his salvation was already assured through the power of Amida’s Vow.

In our families, we have assumed that our children will follow the Jodo Shinshu path just as we followed through the influence of our grandparents and our parents. This truth is that each individual chooses his or her own path. Shakamuni Buddha’s last words to his disciples were “Make of yourself a light. Rely upon yourself…Make the teachings your light. Rely upon them…” Here Shakamuni asks each disciple to rely upon the teachings as a guide. The words apply to us as well in good times as well as bad; we must rely on the truth of the Teachings rather than on another power.
Shakamuni Buddha said, ”A family is a place where minds come in contact with one another. If these minds love one another, the home will be as beautiful as a flower garden. But if these minds get out of harmony with one another, it is like a storm that plays havoc with the garden. If discord arises within a family, the members should not blame each other or other people; instead, they should examine their own minds and follow a right path.” This right path is the Eightfold-path. The first of the right path is “ike pono” in Hawaiian, which means to have right view, to see things as they are, illuminated by Infinite Wisdom and Immeasurable Compassion.

Before any adversity occurs, when we are very ill and too weak to express what is within our heart, families need to share their views on life and death. They should not wait until someone is frail and old, ill with a terminal disease, or injured in an unexpected accident. Change occurs each moment. Understanding things as they are can only strengthen the family.

The spiritual essence of the ultimate reality of Amida’s Vow embraces each one of us. Share with family the presence of Amida Buddha’s Immeasurable Compassion that embraces all. Listen to the words of a child who, when asked, “Where is the Buddha?” pointed to his heart. Yes, the compassionate heart of Amida Buddha is right here. With our families let us share our view, our understanding, on the issues of Life and Death. We need not ask for a greater power to help us. Amida’s Vow has already done that. Namo Amida Butsu.

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